Out of the mouths of clients

I've got clients in all different businesses. Most of them are great, but occasionally they say stuff that just makes me wonder. These quotes are real, but I'm not saying who they're from because I really don't want to get fired.

From the marketing director of a manufacturing company:

"Now, you've sent me a 4-page PDF. Could you re-save that as four separate PDFs so that I could print out the pages one at time... you know, separately?"

# # #

From the marketing director of a healthcare products manufacturer (circa, oh, 1997):

"Do they call it the World Wide Web because it goes all over the world?"

# # #

From the VP of marketing at a financial services company:

Client: "I got the new brochure layout, but we didn't want to change any of the copy. I'm not sure why you changed the copy; we wanted to keep it exactly the same."

Agency: "Did you read it? We didn't change the copy at all. It is laid out a little differently - you know, one wide column on the page instead of two columns."

Client: "Well, I didn't read it. That's just what the HR director told me... that it was changed."

Agency: "Oh. Well, it's exactly the same. We only changed the layout, like you asked."

Client: "Oh. Okay."

# # #

From a business unit manager of a building products company:

"We're just really awful to work with. Sorry."

# # #

From a retail marketing liaison at a building products company (to my partner and co-creative director):

"Do you quilt?"

To be fair, this was part of a non-job related discussion and my business partner was, in fact, waxing enthusiastic about a quilt that one of his art school classmates had made. But I'm not sure how the client made the leap to him actually quilting himself.