The 8 Commandments of Sandal Season

Sandal season is upon us, ladies. That means it’s time to brush up on the 8 Commandments of this mostly lovely, but potentially gross, foot-baring season. Feel free to add your own.

1. Thou shalt shave your toes. (That’s right, shave your toes. We all have little hairs on them and we totally forget about it in the winter because our toes are only briefly bared during the transfer from one pair of socks to the next. Clean ‘em up.)

2. Thou shalt use lotion. (On your legs. And your feet. And on any other exposed skin because white, crackly flakes - or skin that is "ashy," as it was called in my high school - are not nice to look at.)

3. Thou shalt invest in a Ped Egg or at the very least some powerful exfoliating scrub. (Your heels should look like heels, not hooves.)

4. Thou shalt not spend unnecessarily on professional manicures. (Seriously, just using a base coat, topcoat and giving yourself enough drying time will make your toes look salon-perfect. For free.)

5. Thou shalt shave your legs every day. (Yes, every day.)

6. Thou shalt avoid the French pedicure. (Why? Because this involves having toenails that are long enough to have a white tip. And it looks weird.)

7. Thou shalt not wear colors appropriate for a 12 year old. (Even if you work in a really creative environment where people actually wear flips flops, like I do, it’s still not a good idea to have alternating polish colors, weird neons or glitter on your toes.)

8. Thou shalt encourage the man in your life to groom his feet. (Nothing is worse than a guy in sandals with overgrown toenails or hoof-like heels. Or both.)

Did I also mention that there is nothing cuter than little wet heads and slick-as-an-otter bodies peeking up at you over the edge of the pool?

Exhibit A:

Here's why swimming lessons are great, especially on a cold day
1. You can leave work early. I mean, I can do that any time, but going to swimming lessons makes me feel less like a slacker and more like a nicely involved mom

2. It's really nice and warm in here.

3. For 30 minutes I truly have nothing to do but sit here.

4. The kids are freakin' tired when we get home!

5. They take a shower here so no additional prolonged bath at home

6. Did I mention that all I have to do is sit here?

Gotta go.....my doing-nothing time is burning up.

Again?

An Ethiopian won the Boston Marathon. They always win. This is not news, Yahoo.

The ugly truth.

Last night I had two bowls of macaroni and cheese for dinner. Kraft, traditional noodle shape, nice and warm and cheesy, with a little salt on top. No salad. No veggie. No protein. Actually I made peas, but conveniently "forgot" about them in the microwave.

Chad and the girls had various combinations of mac & cheese, chicken nuggets and Chad's custom blend of baked beans with cut-up hot dogs.

I really believe in making healthy, balanced meals. I truly enjoy a fresh, crisp salad with my dinner.

But to tell you the truth, I'd be perfectly happy just eating a bowl of mac & cheese with a big ole' glass of milk. And no matter how many great/fast/easy/kid-friendly/ready-in-30-minutes recipes I have, some days making dinner is just too.... I don't know.... exhausting.

And I refuse to feel bad about that.

Still filing....

The sky was dark with the gentlest hint of light blue peeking up above the horizon. The car was loaded - luggage on top, snacks in the back, DVD player ready and bikes on the rack. We swept up the girls, blankets and all, and buckled them into their car seats, still in their jammies. One last check of the doors, turn on the alarm and off we go into the 6 am darkness on a family road trip to Pawley's Island, South Carolina - two parents, two kids, one grandma and a black lab named Charlie.

Because I'm pretty much addicted to my iPhone, I decided to keep some travel notes on it as we drove. Here are some of the highlights:

April 2
6:15 am – Lauren is singing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" and MIL is filing her nails, which sounds extraordinarily loud in the dark at this hour.

6:35 – MIL is still filing her nails. How many fingers does this woman have?!?!

6:52 – Still filing....

8:10 – MIL is putting on lavender essential oil. I think my nose hairs are curling. Kids are coloring quietly - those lap desks from Hobby Lobby are working great!

8:24 – Seriously, my eyes are watering a little from the oil. I'm not going to complain about her the whole time, but man, who puts on scented oils in an enclosed space the size of a refrigerator?

10:57 – We've made one stop and both Charlie and Lauren pooped, so it was totally worthwhile. That and the McGriddle I had for breakfast. Lauren had to poop while I was already on the toilet, so I had to get up with pants around my knees and assume my usual position - standing in front of her with her head against my legs and hands on the sides of my knees - while she pooped. Smells great. Heading south, lots of hills and beautiful flowering trees.

11:09 – We're on 275 going in and out of Kentucky and Indiana. I swear to God I just saw a dead kangaroo on the side of the road.

4:07 – Our third stop - gas and Starbucks. Lauren napped. Grace didn't, but so far so good. Have headache, probably from waiting until 4:07 to get my Starbucks.

And that's just day one.

Good mom, bad mom

Good mom comes back to Grace's room after tucking in Lauren for a little extra snuggle and a few stories about when I was kid.

Bad mom tells Lauren she can have lots of pancakes for breakfast when Lauren starts to cry at bedtime that she's hungry.

Good mom has grapes and crackers ready for a post-swimming lessons snack.

Bad mom forgot to bring underwear for the girls to put on after swimming lessons are over.

Good mom gets out the matching aprons and lets the kids do most of the work - and all of the spilling - while we make cupcakes.

Bad mom makes muffins while the kids are sleeping and then hides them in the morning so Chad and I can have them to ourselves.

Good mom has all the kids clothes clean and laid out on the toybox at bedtime, so the morning will go more smoothly.

Bad mom is stuffing microwaved pancakes into ziploc bags, then throwing them and the kids into the car.

Good mom has the kids bathed and in their clean jammies with enough time left over for two bedtime stories.

Bad mom figured they can go one more day without a bath AND says it's so late we can only sing songs, no stories.

Why is that bad mom really seems a lot more like NORMAL mom?